Provoking Divine Mercy

י"ט תמוז התשס"ח
Faunus 21

Dreaming Of Moshiach blogs in Provoking Divine Judgment:

Grand Rabbi Mayer Alter Horowitz Shilta, popularly known as the Bostoner Rebbe of Jerusalem, commented on the first despicable tractor terrorist attack in Yerushalayim and said that we are considered like "sheep to be slaughtered." The Rebbe Shlita hinted that the terrorist attack was a result of the abomination parade that caused desecration of Yerushalayim.

The shame parade took place in the Holy City Jerusalem June 26th. Six days after the abomination parade, we witnessed the first bulldozer terrorist act in the streets of Jerusalem, killing 3 people, HI'D and injuring dozens.

It's not always easy to see Divine Judgment, but this one can be very easily seen: TWENTY SIX (gematria YKV"K) days after the abomination parade inside the Holy City, the city of Dovid Hamelech [King David], on King David Street, the same street the abomination parade took place, the second horrific bulldozer terrorist driver attempted to murder Jews on King David St. wounding 23 people.

Indeed, I don't see Divine Judgment. I see Divine Mercy at work in this latest incident. Twenty-six days after the parade inside the Holy City, a second bulldozer attack failed to murder anyone like sheep at a slaughter. Instead, a bull was slaughtered by spear in my dream, twenty-six days after the Holy City parade.

Now, while the first bulldozer attack, as Dreaming of Moshiach points out, occurred six days after the parade and is therefore connected to the masculine letter vav (the bull and the channel from keter to FEMININE binah), the second bulldozer attack which occurred (YHVH) twenty-six days after the parade is connected to the feminine spear of my dream last night and the letter zayin (the spear and the channel from chochmah to FEMININE gevurah). Witness that. The feminine powers (binah and gevurah) defined and gave life to the two bulldozer events of opposite outcomes.

who can rescind it and who can return it

Perfectly And Abundantly Made

י'ו באדר ב' תשס"ח
Raven 17

Ten Sefirot of Nothingness, ten and not nine, ten and not eleven
Understand with Wisdom, be Wise with Understanding ...

עשר ספירות בלימה, עשר ולא תשע, עשר ולא אחת-עשרה
הבן בחכמה וחכם בבינה

Sefer Yetzirah 1:4

The moon (ב) is in Virgo (י) in the second House of Acquisition of the zodiac in my sidereal natal chart. What does this בי mean? It literally means "with ten". With ten what, exactly? There is "nothing" to tell me what "ten" בי is referring to. Wait, I understand now! I remember the words "ten sefirot of nothingness, ten and not nine, ten and not eleven" that I am made with.

The word for "ten" in the above excerpt from Sefer Yetzirah is עשר. The shoresh עשר means "enriching", "being abundant", and "complete unit".

The word for "nine" in the above excerpt is תשע. The shoresh תשע means "decrease" and "less than a complete unit".

The word for "eleven" in the above excerpt is אחת-עשרה. Here is where the vessels may become shattered. אחת is the feminine form of "one" unit (as אחד is the masculine form of "one" unit). One complete unit holds the feminine and masculine forces it contains in equal balance. In the Hebrew word for eleven (אחת-עשרה), the feminine unit force (אחת) emerges unilaterally increased (עשרה), which would ultimately result in an uncontainable and destructive imbalance among the polarities, and thereby shatter the vessels.

Thus, "with ten" Understanding and Wisdom are bestowed abundantly and in perfect balance so as not to shatter the vessels.

With "nine", Understanding and Wisdom lack fullness and wither.

With "eleven", there is too much Understanding and not enough Wisdom. Understanding is a powerful force of restrictive differentiation. Without an equal balancing Wisdom force of expansive integration to meet Understanding's movements, the vessels implode and shatter.

Taken together, I wisely have come to understand that I have been perfectly and abundantly made "with ten" in complete harmony.

There are seven Hebrew words in the portion of the excerpt "ten and not nine, ten and not eleven" (עשר ולא תשע, עשר ולא אחת-עשרה).

There are ten Hebrew words in the excerpt "ten sefirot of Nothingness, ten and not nine, ten and not eleven" (עשר ספירות בלימה, עשר ולא תשע, עשר ולא אחת-עשרה).

Thus, I manifestly acquired בי at birth.

Eishet Chayil Of The House Of Zayin

י'ה באדר ב' תשס"ח
Raven 16

There are two astrologically significant points in the seventh House of Zayin in my sidereal natal chart. They are, like Betzalel and Ohaliov, artistic talent in partnership with the Divine:

Venus - kaf (כ), the power to actualize potential and manifest rectified Will.

Chiron - כירן, artistic molder, from the shoresh כור meaning to purify, repair and correct; the ability to rectify Will; from which is derived the word כיר, meaning to be molded, to mold - in other words "chiron" brings down the ability to mold (purify and form) and be molded into (actualize) one's messianic spark, represented by nun-sofit.

The House of Zayin in my natal chart is in Aquarius (Dlee, צ), which brings out the ability to draw Divinity into manifest revelation.

The configuration of the seventh house offers insight into the Divine "I" as a helpmate to the personal "self" as described in the first house of the zodiac.

The Power Of Az

There are two traditional "discrepencies" involving the number 70. One is in Vayigash and the other concerns the number of lines the shirah of parashat Ha'azinu must be written on. Two other numbers connected to the "70 discrepencies" are the numbers 1 and 3. Both 1 and 3 pertain to the constellation of the upper sefirot; 1 to keter and 3 to chochmah, binah and da'at. The number 70, of course being a multiple of 7, pertains to the "woman of valor" operating as an interface between the lower 7 sefirot and the upper sefirot within the worlds of yetzirah (70) and assiyah (7).

Putting the extremes (sefirot-wise) together, one has:
az (אז), then - see Bahir 139-142 for significance

Also interestingly 70-7 spells "power":
az (עז)

I've written a little previously about the "70 discrepencies" here:
The Aleppo Codex, Serach & Hanhaga

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Pedestal, The Good Wife

satire of eishet chayil, Mishlei 31:10-31

oh! what a rare find is a capable wife
her worth is far beyond that of rubies
lacking no good thing
all the days of her life, never bad, ever praised
set of mind, acquiring
a pharaoh's treasure, whatever it may be
with her own labor she builds her house
unworried for her household
from afar she brings her food, cheerfully
the near needy, her mouth is full
her fingers work the spindle making cloth
she sells it
always looking for wool and flax
to which her hand is set, working
with an artistry unknown
to the wild, wild flower
who laughs, who cries, who rises, who falls, giving all
who dances naked with the night
who flees, to where angels fear to go
who ever hides
from the hideous perfection coldly imposed
upon the pedestal
where a fully human wife will never be

oh! what a rare find is a capable husband
oh! what a rare find is a capable teacher
upon a pedestal, one fully human will never be

shatnez testers

Kedoshim, Vayikra 19:27-28
the edge remains, keeping death away ...

Bamidbar 14:17
י גדל-נא כח אדנ י

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Chozeret B'Teshuvah

את comes to add:

I had an odd dream. In it, I was given an Israeli-Jewish identity card on which I was "identified" temporarily (in the dream, since I am unmarried) as a חוזרי. In the dream, I knew that the word reflecting my "identity status" would change upon becoming married. My dream was very specific - the word was spelled חוזרי (I saw the letters within my dream) plus another hidden letter [1a] which I can't articulate now that I'm awake (although I can still perceive its presence hovering, touching yet not touching the mind).

There were no written vowels with the letters (like a Torah scroll, signifying kedushah) on the card, just the letters of the word. The word was located in the middle "identity" section of the card, in the top line between two other words (each in its appropriate respective "section"). Attention "drilled down" to focus on this word/card within the context of a larger dream, most of which I've now forgotten. Yet, like fire on fire, I received this word and these letters as Moshe Rabbeinu received the Torah on Har Sinai - like a Torah written without vowels.

I feel I had this dream partly in response to the thread on a Jewish forum I participate in, which presented the question "what do you consider yourself to be, based on what"? I've always thought myself to be a ba'alat teshuvah, but the word in my dream was חוזרי, plus a hidden letter of some implicate order (of the esoteric or unrevealed world). The revealed word and letters (like fish) were brought forth (explicated) from the hidden realms of being into my dream - to answer the question as to "what I am" presently.

I asked, following the dream:

1. What is the nuance/distinction of meaning between a "chozer" and a "ba'al teshuvah"?

2. When I looked up the word in the dictionary this afternoon, I found that the word chozer means penitent [2]. So, what is the exact meaning of the revealed word as it is spelled in the dream?

3. Like ba'alat teshuvah is to ba'al teshuvah, is there a feminine grammatical form of a female "chozer", and if so, what is it?

A forum poster responded that the word חוזרי meant "my piggy". But the word חוזרי, as spelled in my dream, didn't (it had a positive connotation in the dream) and doesn't mean that (I looked it up). Chazir means pig [2]. Chozer means penitent.

pig is spelled חזיר
my pig would be חזירי

penitent is spelled חוזר
my penitent would be חוזרי

The two words are opposites: chozer (chozer-i, or "I return") means the opposite of my pig ... based on this somewhat nonlinear, yet nevertheless clear, logic:

It is not an uncommon thing in hebrew for words with similar letters to have opposite meanings [3] based upon vowel articulations and letter permutations/anomalies - like the roots [4]:

גוד with a vav means to connect, while
גדה with a hey means to divide

Even a vav (ו) itself can mean to connect or to divide, depending on whether it is a vav hachibur (connective) or a vav hahipuch (conversive or transformative). The vav hahipuch can not only invert tenses, it can invert meanings [1b].

The root חוז implies development toward a goal [4], while the root חזר means development is arrested [4].

תא a cell of the Temple:

In reverse order (as befits the vav hahipuch which converts the word chazir into the word chozer, thereby transforming the meaning from one of arrested development to one of progressing development):

3. Chozeret (חוזרת) is the feminine form of the word chozer. A woman making aliyah, for example, would be a chozeret b'teshuvah. Significantly, the root of chozeret has a vav (ו), which can be either connective or dividing, while the root of pig lacks this ability to truly choose (bechirah) between connection and division. In other words, the "pig" person is controlled by mazal (fate), while the chozeret is a Jewish person of destiny (who transcends mazal and can influence reality in a cosmic way). Thus, chozeret is a woman with bechirah, a beit habechirah (בית הבחירה), and a house chosen by Hashem.

2. The word chozer implies one is returning [5], making teshuvah and going up (making aliyah, both literally and esoterically). In other words, it implies someone actively on the path of spiritual development and ascent of consciousness. Chozer/chozeret (like aur chozer) implies returning to the source (in the "development" process of teshuvah, for example); and thus, chozer/chozeret implies development toward a goal. Given these implications, chozer/chozeret can be seen to be a word derived from the חוז root, where a reish (ר), the letter of clarification and clarity, has been added to the root (חוז) to form the word, chozer. Thus, chozer means חוז-ר, the development of clarity.

1. The concept of "aur chozer" pertains to the returning light of the eishet chayil as described in kabbalah regarding the letter zayin (ז). Sarai/Sarah epitomizes this returning light. Sarai was a woman whose name originally had a yod (י) ending, until Hashem split the yod (like the yam suf was split) and gave one of her letters hey (ה) to Avram (Avraham). The letter hey (ה) ("added" to both Sarai's and Avram's names) pertains to the process of teshuvah (tashuv hey). Consequently, we can see that the letters hey from Sarai are the force which drives the process of teshuvah for both the female and male soulmates.

Tradition teaches that the time will come (during the messianic era) when the feminine will have greater access to transcendental consciousness than the masculine; and in that time, she will bestow and man will receive from her [6]. Clearly, in this case, woman is bestowing the influence toward teshuvah upon man. Clearly, that time is now as the yod (י) expresses-to-bestow-understanding (הה) - in other words, as the yod (י) at the end of the word (חוזרי) in my dream unfolds (ה) into this dvar Torah (ה).

In the dream, the word chozer on my "identity card" was linked to the idea of being unmarried. I knew that my "identity status" would change upon becoming married. The word (בעל/בעלת) ba'al/ba'alat is from a root (בעל) spelled like the word itself. Interestingly, this word (בעל), in addition to meaning master (as in master of teshuvah, בעל תשובה) implies being married, marrying and having a husband [4].

טפסרט transforming darkness to light:

My dream (chalom) occurred subsequent to a question posted on a forum thread. A dream can be an answer to a dream question, a she'elot chalom, posed while awake. The question was asked "what do you consider yourself to be?" My dream told me more specifically what I am, as opposed to what I've merely considered myself to be. I've considered myself to be a ba'alat teshuvah (and I am indeed, at one level of understanding). My dream clarified more precisely that I am also a chozeret b'teshuvah.

I hadn't even heard of the phrase chozeret b'teshuvah or the word chozer(et) before today (especially in connection with the idea of being a religious returnee). Moreover, "chozer" wasn't something I was thinking about, and therefore dreamt about it. It came to me from a place "deeper" than thought. It came from at least the level of will (ratzon in keter, which precedes thought, machshavah in malchut).

At the level of thought (with choach mah, chashuv mah), I thought I was a ba'alat teshuvah.

At the level of will, I am truly a chozeret b'teshuvah, and now I know it (keter + 2 levels of daat) and think it too (chochmah, malchut).

אתתא טפסרט evolving woman and providing a light to man

References and Footnotes:

[1] The Wisdom In The Hebrew Alphabet, R. Michael L. Munk;

(1a) on the 4-headed shin: "The divine 4-headed shin, which comes into existence only because it is framed by the exterior walls, alludes to the ways of Hashem which are concealed, incapable of perception by the limited human mind."

(1b) on the vav: transforming anguish to joy, and vice versa

[2] The New Bantam-Meggido Hebrew & English Dictionary

[3] Letters of Fire, R. Matityahu Glazerson. Other examples of words changing and inverting meaning through letter manipulations include (דוה/הוד) davah/hod - exile/the Holy Temple; (חרם/רחם) destruction/mercy; (חמה/חומה) chemah/chomah - wrath/a protecting wall.

[4] Etymological Dictionary Of Biblical Hebrew, R. Matityahu Clark

[5] http://www.hashkafah.com/index.php?s=&showtopic=21820&view=findpost&p=477588:

(5a) to go around (searching). Koh. R. to VII, 8 hu chozeir 'alyah he searches it again (tries to recover his scholarship): ib. yakhol hu lakhazor 'alyah he may recover it a. e.; v. infra

(5b) to turn around, return; to; retract, repent. Ib. chazor b'kha come back (repent)! Eduy. V. 65 chazor c'kha withdraw thy opposition.--DemIV, 1 chazrah l'makomah came back to its place (was mixed up again). Maas. Sh. I, 5 yechz'ru damim v'khulu the money shall return to its former condition, i.e. the sale is annulled, and the money has again its sacred character. Ker. 8a nachzor 'al hareishonot let us go back to what was said first. Sabb. 188b; Arakh. 15b mimi...v'chazarti lacharei I enver said a word (about a fellowman) on which I went back (when confronted with him). Kidd. 59a v'chazrah bah and she reconsiders (her consent to be married); chozeret she may do so; Gitt. 32b Ib. chozer magreish bo dare he use the same letter of divorce again (after he has revoked it)? Ter. IV, 3 Chazar v'hosif then again he added., Gitt. Vi, 5 Chazru lomeir then again they said (added); a. v. fr.

[6] R. Schneur Zalman of Liadi, Tefilat LeKhal HaShana, pp. 138-139.

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