Running With The Wind

Ketoret, The Psychosynthesis Of Sarah And Hagar

I dreamt.

I was a poor lowly Jewish woman. My husband and I were simple Jews. Our situation reminds me of the movie Dreamer, based on the true comeback story of champion Mariah's Storm (alias in the movie, Soñador, meaning "dreamer" in Spanish). I had one horse (סוס) I had rescued and recovered¹ (תרסו 666 -> 126 סוס). There was a big prestigious race coming up. My horse wasn't favored to win, and was the underdog. Nobody could even understand how my horse had been allowed to enter the race.

One Jewish woman whose powerful purebred was also in the race outspokenly didn't believe I or my horse belonged in the race. She wanted us to be kicked out of the competition. She rallied behind the scenes to get my horse and I disqualified for various reasons.

She wasn't successful at it. Though we were underdogs, my horse and I were led into the competition's sleeping quarters to rest the night before the race, to prepare for the race the next day. My humble horse was at the head of the line leading into the area where all the racing families and their horses were housed before the race. Though my horse was an underdog and not really expected to win, it's pre-race speed score qualified it for the prestigious "first" position. My horse is reishit.

My nemesis hated me on account of it. She thought I didn't belong at the race at all, let alone being "allowed" to start in first position. Even though my horse and I had earned the "first starting position", she wanted it for herself and felt it belonged to her and her horse. She tried to rally people against me.

She wore a tattoo on her arm like tefillin, although it wasn't tefillin. It was a tattoo. She tried to boast that she was more Jewish than I and that she deserved the first position instead of me. She flashed her bare arm with the tattoo around at people like it was a badge demonstrating her "real" Jewishness. She used this tattoo as some kind of symbol to demonstrate to everyone that she was more Jewish than I. Given that I didn't have this "symbol of Jewishness" tattooed on my arm like tefillin like she did - she implied that I wasn't Jewish and didn't belong in the race. She was trying to get people to doubt my Jewishness and that I even belonged in the race at all. She desperately wanted my horse and I disqualified. The tattoo (which she tried to pass off as tefillin) on her arm was her proof of her Jewishness (over mine), she preached to those she had gathered together.

I stayed in my room with my horse and my husband. My horse was sleeping on the top bunk of a bunkbed in our room. The race doctor who checked all the horses for fitness prior to the race came to check out my horse. We woke the horse up and she stumbled down out of the top bunk. She was just like me - she stumbled awake with the kind of initial sleep inertia I typically wake up with. My horse and I were of the same stuff. I loved my humble beautiful sweet little horse. She was such a good horse. I smiled.

The doctor put a thermometer in her mouth, checked her temperature and gave her a pre-race physical. She passed with flying colors! We are good to go!

Meanwhile, as I observed my horse get her pre-race physical, in the back of my mind, I was aware of the rabble-rousing actions of my nemesis against me. I didn't know who she was exactly, but I saw what she was doing and why she was doing it. I saw her as she gathered people together to "preach" against me, all the while flashing her bare arm with its "Jewish" tattoo at them for emphasis.

I also saw in my mind's eye, Nazis come into the racing community. They were among those she flashed with her bare arm and Jewish tattoo. They were going to cut her arm off. They grabbed her as one of them flashed a machete or some other similar large cutting blade. I warned her husband somehow that they were going to cut her arm off so that he could intervene to stop it. For some reason, I couldn't intervene in any other way but to warn him of the imminently impending amputation of his wife's arm. I was confined to my pre-race quarters - it was the fit thing to do. I had to stay with my horse and my husband. None of those the woman had gathered together to listen to her could intervene on her behalf either - anyone who intervened on her behalf would have his or her arm cut off along with the bare-armed tattoo-ed woman.

Her husband was busy with a racing community meeting and brushed off my warning. He didn't believe me. He thought I was overreacting - the Nazis were just making trouble. He didn't believe they'd really cut his wife's arm off. He walked away from my warning, brushing it off.

They were really going to do it. They captured her and tied her to a wooden wall of the community. They were preparing to cut her arm off. They are going to do it.

I turned my attention back to my horse and husband, where it needed to be. My husband told me not to worry and held my hand. I knew my horse and I would win the race. Just like the horse in the movie Dreamer.

I woke up.

Footnote:

¹ A horse (סוס) is symbolic of evolution (see link above). The gematria of its letters is 126, one less than the 100 and 20 and 7 years of Sarah. Importantly, 126 is the reverse im hakolel of 127, and thus is also the reverse vision, of Sarah's life, where 126 symbolizes the small self-nullification epitomized by Har Hermon and the tikun of Sarah's arrogance over Hagar. This makes sense, given that in the dream I am a poor lowly Jewish woman which reflects the soul powers of bitul and shiflut, respectively. Consequently, we can see that 666 has now not only been rectified with respect to the error of Adam and Chavah, but also with the respect to the error of Sarah and Avraham.

This is accomplished by transforming 666 (תרסו) into a horse (סוס). Zohar refers to the Hebrew letters as horses of fire (shin, ש). My horse (hebrew letter) ran like the wind (aleph, ).

Note that תרסו ends with 66, like the סו of the treatise Hemshech Yom Tov Shel Rosh Hashana Tof Reish Samech Vov. This word which ends with סו (where סו implies perpetuation) can be permutated according to meaning into the shoresh תרן, ending with a nun sofit (where ן also implies perpetuation). This shoresh means to "raise high" (Etymological Dictionary Of Biblical Hebrew, R. Matityahu Clark). Thus, 666 (תרסו) and the error associated with it is further transformed and elevated back into the realm of the holy through the permutation of 666 into 126, with an aroma pleasant to the Divine (like the ketoret), making shiflut become geut. Now, we can understand how Keturah is the tikun, re-unification and elevation of both Sarah and Hagar, who epitomize ruthlessness and selfishness in the feminine psyche, respectively.

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