Thurisaz Rune Poem

This is another poem I wrote about 15 years ago attempting to describe another preincarnate memory I have carried with me all of my life - one that is very near to the point where I was "thrown down" towards actually incarnating. It is a dark dark poem. I am linking this experience to Thurisaz, the thorn which awakens the will to action, a rune whose essence pertains to dangerously aggressive forces, women's suffering, harnessing the unstoppable, initiatory testing (in my preincarnate state - the initiation into incarnation), and also, if one is able to "grasp the thorn" so to speak, grapple with it successfully, and to transform it into a tool of evolving consciousness, then it may also be linked to the power of Thor's Hammer. This poem also links to the Goddesses Frigg and Saga, as I will explain (according to my experience anyway) following the poem.

The Thorn

from the mind inscribed before time in a dreamlike primeval existence
before my life began, at your side, I loved you
set before seeing, witnessing the violent play of creation
rising jagged with twisting thorns ascending toward there
wild and fierce the bloody storm from below, a churning pit of cold fire and coal
dripping with pain torn from earth, cutting edges
raging from a lawless horror, a terror untamed upon the earth
spreading as a plague coming near with powerful fury, iterating screams
reverberating with dysrhythm, the battering melody shattering the noise of silence
in agony melding together, into a cyclone of spiraling shrill despair
hopeless, the sound of an inky blackness, line upon line writing
a writhing scroll, twisted with affliction, death and blood everywhere
below the colorlessness of the sanctuary where I stood, immobile in the sight
testifying, not forgotten, revealing some wordless cry of terror
embedding beyond the throat, becoming chained in the belly
burning my world, descending into the hallowed depths of my heart
with no way to restrain it, its direction of attraction
toward me the knife came to cut
please see me! I am here! I cried without sound - to you as you watched it climb up
as you watched it climb up with some curious, strange fascination
not seeing me, or disregarded, either way, outside your direction of attention
as the rabid destruction erupted up the wall, and all I could do to escape the blade
becoming broken, I turned away, pulling myself in ... only to be thown away
thrown down, as a coarse grain into the only history I ever knew, and I know
what you did, throwing me down to be ripped apart, for those who would destroy me
why do you hate me - still you don't see me, you don't hear me, and you don't care
try as I might to rewrite the story, I cannot forget the truth
and some things can never be fixed

Saga in Gylfaginning

 As discussed in Gylfaginning:

In answer to ‘Who are the  Asyniur?’

‘The highest (first) is Frigg.  She has a dwelling called Fensalir and it is very splendid.  Second is Sága.  She dwells at Sökkvabekkr, and that is a big place.’ [From Snorri Sturluson’s Edda, translated by Anthony Faulkes]

This snippet from the lore brings Frigg and Saga together in the same discussion and in the same order as does my poem (in the poem above with excerpts noted below):

The highest (first) is Frigg.  

The etymology of the name Frigg is:

in Icelandic as frjá which means "to love." All of these names, as well as the words friend and affray are ultimately from the Proto-Indo-European (PIE) root pri- meaning 'to love.'

The first lines of my poem are clearly Frigg-lines which pertain to loving:

from the mind inscribed before time in a dreamlike primeval existence
before my life began, at your side, I loved you
set before seeing

Consequently, first (highest) in my poem is Frigg.

Second is Saga.

Second in my poem comes Saga, goddess of Cosmic Memory whose name means "epic story", who ends my poem with these Saga-lines:

try as I might to rewrite the story, I cannot forget the truth
and some things can never be fixed

In my experience, Frigg and Saga are one and the same, and both are connected to Thurisaz.